late night ramblings: I just want to say thank you.

5:40 AM

It's been days or maybe weeks that I am sad because I feel alone I don't know what I need then i realized I've been craving for attention,for affection...for friends.

photo from tumblr

Have you ever felt tired of explaining things to people? But then realized that they won’t know, they will NEVER know if you won’t tell and explain to them, but you’re just tired of putting their attention to you because you are sure that they will think that you’re an attention-whore, so you just keep quiet, waiting and waiting for someone to ask “hey are you okay?” but no one does, no one knows what you’re feeling and no one stays. NO ONE can see right through you.They said they’re here for you,that they understand you, just ask them, tell them, but what if ASKING FOR HELP IS THE HARDEST THING TO DO?

It's just you know, none of my friends can feel what I'm feeling because of course I don't tell them, how can you even tell someone that you need them? and it will just hurt that they don't know you need them. Of course we talk,not all the time but it's alright, but I guess no one can really see the pain inside. 

I feel unimportant.

What keeps me going these past few days is reading blogs and the owner of the blogs replies with my comments, even though they're just replying, it somehow means a lot to me because I felt important even just for a while, that what I said matters and is worth replying. 

But what really makes me happy?- to go on with my life?  this blog! and the bloggers who comment on my post, this blog is just about 2 months old, I just made it for me to have an outlet of my feelings and my artsy/make-up ventures and I was surprised that someone out there gets to read it and that's more than enough, but they actually take time to comment and tell me a lot of heart-warming things, I won't mention na who you are you know yourselves naman hehe :) Just really, thank you very much. You make me happy.

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